Carola had a wonderful track record, super reputation and was constantly hounded by headhunters to interview for what might have been wonderful opportunities under other circumstances under other circumstance. But, she would smile at the offers and let them pass, acknowledging how much she enjoyed her work and her company.

Just past her 42nd birthday, her company decided to launch a series of acquisitions that continued over the next several years. Initially, her responsibilities grew as did her staff and her company standing. She was involved in the integration process every step of the way. Carola felt in control, confident and excited about her work and life in general.

However, 6 months ago, her firm began merger talks with a competitor. The current transition team from her company was substantially smaller than in the past. She was not involved. She began to worry that once the merger was finalized, her position would be eliminated.

When the next headhunter called, she listened and instead of referring him to a colleague who might be interested, she jumped on the opportunity.  She brought her resume up to date and before she knew it, she was interviewing. Within 4 months she had several offers, chose the one that drew her and gave her notice.  Her mental state was relaxed and focused. She was ready to move, she had lost trust in her company and her sense of safety and value was threatened. She was confident in her skills and clear about what she wanted.

However, before she could make any significant progress in her interviewing, she had to learn to answer one question: "Tell me About yourself," a  seemingly  off-handed question that turns out to be one of the most critical interview questions one has to answer.

Carola sat with the VP of HR of her selected prospective company. The position seemed ideal for her and she had heard wonderful stories of involvement as well as the innovative and collaborative culture of this company. She loved their product lines and was captivated by their CEO's vision when he spoke at one of meetings she attended. She had actually looked forward to the interview and meeting the executive team. However, she never got past the VP of HR. The interview seemed to flat-line from the beginning.  

Glancing at Carola's resume, the HR VP looked up, gave her a warm smile and said:  "Tell me about yourself," without giving the question much thought, she launched in with her history and background, where she was born and in 5 or 6 minutes covered most of her life and her promotions... recapping much of her resume. Without knowing it, she pretty much ended the interview right there. Recovery would require a special flair--a skill she did not have as yet.  

Years ago, I headed the HR function for a Management and IT Consulting firm, as well as heading the Re-engineering Practice. I did the initial screening for all areas of the firm. If someone made it past me, there were quite likely to get hired and stay with the firm for a long time. That ability to screen was one of my gifts.  
My schedule was hectic, and often, I was not very prepared for the candidate. I needed a few minutes to review the person's background as we sat down at the start of the interview. To buy a little time, I asked: "Tell Me About Yourself," as I continued to review my notes and highlighted points in  the resume. While it might not look like it, I was politely paying attention to what the person was saying. I wasn't listening for anything in particular, just listening... I had not realized during those early years that the way a candidate answered the questions would shape not only our discussion, but my initial (Post-hand-shake) and generally lasting impression. Research shows that I am not alone, it is considered the most powerful question in the whole interview process (and the answer is one I remember best).  

Beyond being a rapport builder, this powerful question opens the door to focus the conversation on highlights, interest, experiences and skills that may be valuable to your prospective employer AND it can even serve to alleviate some concerns about potential knock-out factors the interviewer may have. It can set the stage for other questions and discussions, whet he interviewer's curiosity, engage the interviewer in getting to know you better...or turn the interviewer off or put him/her to sleep. It can set the energy, tone, depth and focus on how the rest of interview will proceed.

Not bad for an answer that takes only 2-3 minutes to give!  At best you will hit a hot button for the interviewer or tap a critical need, problem or interest and she will want to continue along the path of tell me "how you can do this for us" question, possibly raising your value in the eyes of the interviewer.

Note: "How" Interviews or discussions around co-designing solutions to the company's specific problems, discussing how you can do "that" for us, i.e. solve our problems and issues and fit in at the same time...  are usually second round interviews that take place after the initial screening of first round candidates. First round interviews are usually designed to narrow the candidate list, share polite information: Who you are. Who we are. What have you done? Challenges? Strengths? Learnings? Etc.

 In many cases, I have seen candidates, move right into the second round screening in the first interview series, closing the door to other candidates. As you can answer this question anyway you choose; you can also choose to focus on anything in your background, interests and life you like. What you say and how you express it can be very impactful improving the depth of the conversation and revealing your connection to the company's real issues. For example, in Carola's case, the cultural challenges that she faced in acquisitions ; how she enjoyed the challenge and successfully integrated the new companies; how she was part of the process that changed the corporate culture from a top-down, directive culture to one that was collaborative and innovative;  how she consolidated business lines, while increasing customer service through high employee and customer engagement;  building the new brand in 7 months--turning a profit in 11 months... and how much she enjoyed doing it!

Next time you are asked those few simple words: "Tell me about yourself," be clear about out of the many facets that make up you, what you emphasize now!

Excuse Me Your Life Is Waiting, Lynn Grabhorn

Nature's Aroma
For just a minute or two, look at a flower holding it closely and deeply smelling its aroma. Take in its natural beauty and perfection. Appreciate its essence. Notice how you feel. Breathe into this feeling. Hold the feeling inside of you. When you need a break, feel tense or want to raise your spirits during the day, recall this experience--its aroma, texture, the image... and allow your sense of appreciation to return.

The Cycle of Life
Choose a plant, flower or newborn animal to observe. Each day, observe its changes--how it grows... how its colors change... how it interacts with nature. Appreciate it's innate ability to adapt and experience life..

Myra loved working in the field. She enjoyed customer contact, negotiating and co-designing solutions with her team and customers. There's little wonder she was the top salesperson in her company for the past 5 years. Even during hard times, she surpassed targets. Her customers loved her and her sales team thrived. She motivated them and was a great coach.

When her boss retired, she was promoted to VP of Sales. At first, everyone was pleased with this decision. But after a couple of months, the moral of the sales force waned. To date, she had not held a team meeting with the entire sales force. Her monthly meetings with the managers consisted mostly of reporting and discussion related to targets. Myra as yet had not formed a vision for the sales team or even thought that was something she needed to do. She felt that it was pretty much business as usual.

Myra continued to support her customers as before and spend much of her time with her old sales team. Her wake-up call came when Jeffrey came into her office with his resignation. He was the person to whom she turned over the management of her old team. They had worked together for a quite a while and had a strong relationship. As they talked, he explained that he had expected two things from her that had not happened. He wanted a strong leader who would motivate the team and cultivate their skills AND he wanted to establish his own leadership style and role for his team. The way she was conducting their sessions was damaging to both. Through George, she realized that she needed to change. He agreed to give her 2 months before quitting and to be more conscious of her impact on others. 

She sought coaching and chose to hold an off-site facilitated meeting using the 5 Dysfunctions of Team approach. She took time to learn more about the 6 other product lines and their role in the company, then formed her own vision for the whole group before the meeting and the group expanded upon it and took ownership. A new level of open conversation flowed after the sessions. She stepped back from her sales function and became more of a mentor or coach. Soon, everyone was thriving. The discussions in her monthly meetings were often animated and opinionated, voices might rise to a crescendo, but no matter what happened they felt trust, respect and appreciation for each other and at the end of the day, they enjoyed working together.

The greatest challenge for Myra and one by which she had been blind-sided when she took this position was the need to change her relationship with her customers... as did her very  perspective of whom were her customers and team. Her vantage point needed to broaden, her knowledge to expand and with a new found awareness, she realized that she needed to play a different role as a team member across the company's total LOB. She had to support her whole sales force AND understand their role in the whole organization...

"One minute of flowing the intense energy of appreciation overrides thousands of hours spent in victim or flat-lining modes," Lynn Grabhorn, Excuse Me Your Life is Waiting